Lukewarm and In-between
August 8, 2025
Sign up for blog updates!
Join my email list to receive updates and information.
In an era of divisiveness, where do we stand? Or do we stand at all?
The Bible’s book of Revelation shows no patience for those who take no stand: “Because you are lukewarm, and neither hot nor cold, I will spit you out.” Harsh words for not doing something.
Why are we so reluctant to commit? Social and psychological pressures play a major role.
Many of us fear social rejection, career consequences, or being ostracized.
Humans also suffer from a strong leaning toward conformity. It’s easier and safer to adopt the stance of our fellows instead of developing an independent position.
Research
distinguishes between two types of commitment:
• Approach commitment is driven by a desire for future rewards
• Avoidance commitment tries to duck the negative consequences of broken relationships
Solomon Asch's experiments
in the 1950s demonstrated the power of group pressure. In his studies, participants conformed to obviously incorrect group answers approximately thirty-seven percent of the time.
Asch noted, "The tendency to conformity in our society is so strong that reasonably intelligent and well-meaning young people are willing to say white is black."
Stanley Milgram was another researcher into “obedience.” His findings showed how strong authority figures are able to influence conformity: two-thirds of participants were okay with administering dangerous electric shocks when told to.
Pressures toward conformity remain robust today, with social media amplifying pack mentality through features such as likes and shares.
It’s this kind of societal uniformity that may give rise to statements like, “their marriage failed.” Marriages don’t fail, people do.
“Mistakes were made” is a side-step. Sorry to be the bearer of bad news, but people make mistakes.
Look at how flat-out honest the composer of Psalm 41 states what happened to him:
My best friend, whom I trusted,
who broke bread with me,
has scorned me and turned against me.
What happens when we’re unwilling to take a stand on important matters? Experts tell us such individuals may struggle to develop a sense of self.
This can lead to a life spent in the slipstream of others.
Sailors, when a storm threatens, head out to sea. They know the most dangerous place is at the dock.
Author Mark Nepo notes this about the ocean: the deep is safest. Near the shore are rocks to be battered against and undertow to fight. By comparison, the deep is a “hammock.”
Peter of Alcantara, Spain, was a sixteenth-century saint known for his energetic efforts toward reforming the Catholic Church. His advice to those of us who fear cutting against the grain: “Matters in the world are in a truly bad state. But if you and I begin in earnest to reform ourselves, a really good beginning will be made.”
Still not convinced? Then turn to the gospel according to Charles M. Schulz, as found in The Complete Peanuts:
Patty: I'll be the good guy.
Shermy: I'll be the bad guy.
Patty: What are you going to be, Charlie Brown?
Charlie Brown: I'll be sort of in-between; I'll be a hypocrite.
(The painting above is “Portrait of Dr. Gachet,” by van Gogh)